Strawberry on Top: Our Infertility Journey

I just want to thank everyone for your outpouring of love, thoughtful comments and support when we announced our big news last week that we are expecting.  We are so excited, and I wanted to share with you all our journey to get to this point.  We had been married for a little over 5 years and felt God lay it on our hearts that we were supposed to expand our family and have children. So I stopped my birth control and waited a few months for it to get out of my system and we started actively trying to have a baby in January 2012.

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I really thought it would happen quickly.  And each month I had various symptoms that led me to believe I might be pregnant (turns out that was endometriosis).  I learned that I couldn’t trust any of those symptoms when month after month the pregnancy tests were negative.  This was such an emotional roller coaster, being hopeful and optimistic that it would happen but at the same time not be too excited so that I wouldn’t get so upset if it didn’t.  And I think that when you are ready to have a baby, even the first month that it doesn’t happen is upsetting.

At my annual appointment with my gynecologist, I talked to her about our trying unsuccessfully and she did some blood work to check my hormone levels. Over the next several months I had a few appointments with her and all of my levels continued to be normal. She was so understanding and after 8 months of trying she told me that she felt that we had tried everything that we could do on our own. She recommended that we see a fertility doctor to get checked out further and try to figure out what was going on.  She said she didn’t want us to wait until it had been a full year because that was so long to wait emotionally, especially if it was something that could be fixed with medicine or a procedure.

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At this point I was very weary with the whole situation and cried out to God and just asked Him why we were going through this.  And when I did, such peace just descended upon me.  And God showed me at that moment that we were to have Joy despite our circumstances and not wish the days away but to make the most of each day. The song “Even If” by Kutless ministered to me so much through our entire journey. It talks about even if things don’t turn out like you thought, that God is still good and still faithful. So that’s the mentality we decided to have through this whole situation.  Not to say there weren’t a few bad days where we got down, but God really helped us to have an unexplainable joy and peace through it all.

In September, we visited Tennessee Reproductive Medicine which I can’t recommend enough! We both went through quite a bit of testing (blood work, exams, etc). and it was another month before we completed all the tests and got the results.  When we met with our Dr., she said that after reviewing all of our results, she was diagnosing us with multi-factor infertility.  Which basically means that Adam & I both had issues contributing to our infertility.  She told us that in our particular case, the only option that would work was to do IVF (in vitro fertilization).  She said that we had a 3% chance of getting pregnant on our own. They also discovered that I had 2 polyps in my uterus and I had to have surgery to remove those and also to remove endometriosis.  Our Dr. also told us she’s so glad that we went ahead and came in and didn’t wait until after we had tried for a year or more because she said we would’ve just kept trying without success.

We were pretty shocked honestly that IVF was our only option.  We really thought there were several things we would be able to do before it got to that point, but unfortunately that was just not the case in our situation.  We didn’t jump right in but took time to pray about it and weigh the pros and cons.  After much prayer, we felt God leading us down the path of IVF. I know that isn’t what everyone would choose and I respect anyone that would decide differently than we did, but for us it was the best decision to at least try it and see what happened.

In January 2013, we began our IVF cycle.  This consists of a couple weeks of daily stimulation shots to help your eggs grow and you go to the doctor every other day during this period to check your hormone levels and also to see how your eggs are growing.  Once the eggs are mature enough, they schedule the egg retrieval procedure, which you get put to sleep for. They go in and extract all the mature eggs and then they fertilize them.  Then you wait 3-5 days to let the embryos grow and then they do the implantation procedure which is when they insert the embryo (or embryos) into your uterus. This procedure isn’t painful at all and you are awake.  We decided just to implant 1 embryo this time (we froze the others hopefully for siblings in the future).   The next part is the hardest where you have to wait approximately 9 to 11 days for the pregnancy test.

That was the longest 9 days of my life I think!! I went in that morning for the blood work and then they call you that afternoon with the results. When they called and told me it was positive, I asked the nurse two more times just to be sure I heard her correctly!;) We are so thankful and thrilled that it worked the first time!!

Sorry this was such a lengthy post but I felt led to share it just in case it can help someone else that goes through infertility.  If you have more in depth questions about IVF, please feel free to email me at macaroniandcheesecake (at) gmail (dot) com

I also want to thank our family and friends who have prayed for us and supported us through this entire process. We couldn’t have made it without you!

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Comments

  1. Infertility is such a painful, scary thing (and one of my and my boyfriend’s bigger fears for the future) but I am so happy that you were able to do IVF with such success and now you are going to just be the most amazing mom! So happy for you <3

  2. I loved reading this! All glory to our GOD in the highest! I am still praying for you!

  3. Wow! What a journey! It’s amazing the different journeys to parenthood. We were fortunate enough to conceive without medical help, but to be honest there are times I almost feel guilty. My sister has had the misfortune of 3 miscarriages, and it has taken her 6 months each time to even get pregnant. With the first one, she would have been due just 3 months after Elliott was born. I pray every day for success for them, and that it is in God’s plan. I try to conscious of her feelings, but it’s hard to always know and understand what people are going through. Thanks for sharing your journey, hopefully it will help others. 🙂

  4. We are going through the same story almost but being in the navy for 8 yrs and 8 yrs of sea duty meant waiting a long time. Its hard to time these things with the navy comings and goings. We finally adopted our adorable and amazing little man. But after 7 yrs of trying and testing and trying diff meds we are on the track to do invitro. Hearing your story gives me hope. Thanks 🙂 I know that invitro doesn’t always work and given that my doc doesn’t really know why I can’t get prego. Lol. Its always good to hear stories with good endings or beginnings 🙂 congrats to u both!!!

  5. Thanks for sharing your story and I am so happy to hear about your success with IVF! Congrats again on your little miracle 🙂

  6. Oh you guys,
    I am so elated for you! I’m in Roatan with wonky wifi so guess I missed your great news!
    Having faced my own , similar issues (I do now have 28 yr. old son and 22 yr. old daughter) I am over the moon for both of you!!
    Janice

  7. Oh friend, thanks for sharing your story – makes me love you even more for being so honest and truthful about getting pregnant. It’s not the easiest thing and we have had our fair share of problems – I had a miscarriage the first time around and I know it’s nothing compared to having fertility problems. It wasn’t until I really started praying to God and asking him to bless us in any way he can. When it finally did happen, it just reassured me that our time will come when you put yourself in God’s hands. And you did the same, and I’m happy to hear about the success of your IVF! Congrats to you and Adam again, and I look forward to hearing more baby stories from ya!! XXOO

    • Thank you Krystal!! I had no idea you had a miscarriage, I can’t imagine the heartache you went through. I agree, it’s all in God’s hands and His timing!:) And I can’t wait for your little cupcake to arrive!:) XOXO

  8. I just want to say congratulations to you and I pray everything will turn out OK !!!!!!!!! I was blessed with three boys and now I have my first grandson !!! You are a strong woman and kudos !!! to your husband for his support to you !

  9. thanks for sharing! we have some friends who have gone through infertility and IVF and know what a journey that can be. God has been so good!

  10. thanks for sharing! we have some friends who have gone through infertility and IVF and know what a journey that can be- and they are pregnant now too. God has been so good!

  11. Thank you for sharing your story! I went through the same thing when I had my daughter 8 years ago. Fertility and IVF is such a humbling process. It’s so stressful, and sad, and hopeful all at the same time. Congrats on your pregnancy! (And you post comes at a great time – National Infertility Awareness week starts tomorrow!)

  12. Bless your heart. Congratulations. God is good.

  13. So happy for you! I never had fertility issues, but I have friends who were blessed with a daughter through IVF. Best of luck with the rest of the pregnancy.

  14. God bless you the little angel is going to grow up on a lot of yummy food :)!

  15. I have been reading your blog for quite some time and don’t know how I didn’t realize we live close to one another! We also went to TRM and loved each and every person there. Thankfully, our time with them was short and we now have a 21 month precious little girl as a result! Congratulations to you!!!!

  16. Congratulations !!!!! I am so happy for you. Children bring a great Blessing into our life. I will send up a prayer for you and your baby. God bless

  17. Thank you for sharing! I can fully empathize with you, as my husband and I were/are in the same position. In 2009 I was diagnosed with stage 4 endometriosis. While we started down the road of fertility treatments, we chose adoption for the time being (we are currently reconsidering IVF). Neither are for the faint hearted! A year ago we welcomed the birth of our first son through the gift of adoption. A verse that has encouraged us is, “I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the LORD…Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD.” (Psalm 27:13,14).

    • I’m so sorry you’ve gone through such a trying situation but so glad that you were blessed with your son through the gift of adoption!! And I love the verse that you shared! 🙂 I pray that if you do IVF that it is successful for you!!

  18. While I have never been pregnant or tried to get pregnant, I can only imagine how difficult, stressful and heartbreaking infertility must be for a sweet, loving couple dying to have children! I wish the right people were able to have all the kids they could ever want and love, and the wrong people couldn’t. It’s only fair, and I know your child is going to be SO lucky to have amazing parents like you guys! Congratulations on finally overcoming this tumultuous battle. Enjoy being preggers!!

  19. Thanks for sharing your story! My son was conceived via IVF and I’m always so happy when it works for other couples as well. It is not an easy path to follow, that’s for sure!

  20. Congrats on the pregnancy! I am very happy for you guys and wish you nothing but the best. I do have a question though. What is your stance on the pro-choice/anti-choice debate? I know you are deeply faithful so that’s why I ask. If you don’t end up using all the embryos for future children, my question is, do you consider them life right now? Do you consider that abortion if you don’t use them all? Do you see a difference?

  21. I ask because I’m going through the same thing with my husband (not pregnant yet though) and struggling with my thought processes. Sorry, I should have clarified These hormone drugs make me sound a bit nuts at times! 🙂

  22. Congratulations on your blessing. My husband and I (who got married in 1996) tried on our own unsuccessfully for several years before going to a reproductive endocrinologist, and tried several different things, including an IVF, which unfortunately didn’t work in our case (we found out later that even if I had gotten pregnant, carrying my own child would have resulted in miscarriage or stillbirth because of a hereditary blood clotting disorder that I found out I had in follow-up testing to the IVF. For us, a child wasn’t in the cards (and I’m sure that’s according to some divine plan I don’t yet know about), but I do remember vividly the roller-coaster of emotions that comes with not only infertility, but the hormones used to treat it. I’m so happy it worked for you the first time, and hope that this pregnancy goes by without incident for you and that in a few short months, you’ll be holding your little miracle. Thanks for sharing your story, I’m sure it will give some hope to many other couples who are struggling with the same thing. All too often infertility is something you feel you have to suffer with all alone, when it seems like everyone around you is getting pregnant without really trying.

  23. steph,

    First off, CONRATS! I had no idea any of this was going on but I wish I had so I could have prayed for you. However, I will be praying for you like crazy to ensure a healthy pregnancy and baby!!
    I love you girl and I am SO happy for you! You are going to be an amazing mother.

    Jen Monroe

    • Jen, So good to hear from you!! Thank you so much for the prayers! I really appreciate them! Thank you for your sweet words! Love you and we need to plan a get together sometime!!